Helping hand P2 *Doctor!Germany X Psychologist!R*

~Helping hand P2~

*Doctor!Germany X Psychologist!Reader*

The (f/c) coloured BMW Z3 hit the roads of the German capital at an insane speed as you maneuvered with skilled hands the black steering wheel,taking rights and lefts with precision,the tires screeching when the turning was taken too short.
Even at night the streets of Berlin were vivid,people walked by,the lamp posts made the city look as if it was lighten by the sun rays,other cars were driven to who knows where,the lights blending together in neon blues and soft pinks.
As soothing and impressing were back then,when your plane landed on the German soil,now were disturbing and it reminded you of all those thoughts - some weren't even yours,but your patients - which burdened you and made you feel alone.

~Time skip~

"Gott!(Name),you got me sick vorried!" the German male said,letting his stiffened shoulders fall.
"Entschuldigung Ludwig!I didn`t mean to!" you responded,bowing your head in embarassement.
"It`s ok!" there was a certain pause in his speech which you found quite awkward.
"So...you can start!I`m listening!" Ludwig uttered,patting the wooden place near him from where the inky black sky could be seen.
"I`m tired,Lud!" you muttered,shock crossing the large German`s features.
"I love my job,I really do!I have always listened to other`s problems,trying to find a solution for them,even if it made me sick.Now it makes me even more insecure!" a sigh escaped your lips as you played with the hem of your nightgown.
"I mean,look at me!I know that I should look you in the eye while talking to you instead of playing with the fabric of my gown.It`s a sign of weakness and I`m aware of it!" a soft wind caressed your bare skin,causing you to shiver,while that breeze seemed to take away as an echo your words.
"Maybe you should stop analizing your gestures.You are obsessed vith it already.I know it helps you in your job,but don`t use them in your free time.For example,I`m Dr.Beilschmidt during vork hours.But vhen I get out of the hospital I`m Ludwig,a normal human vith a normal life.The Ludwig you know!" the German spoke in a soft,lullying voice wrapping his jacket around your small shoulders.
"You are right...but I just can`t help it!I feel like a hypocrite.I`m all smiley and happy towards my patients,while I feel so shattered on the inside.I can`t help but think 'What did Lovino Vargas do wrong to be so hesitant when it comes to taking decisions?Haven`t society broke his fragile soul so that he built a wall between him and the others?'.And I realize in the next instant that the thread of security is taking over me.Or Arthur.He really loves Alfred and his single wish is that he could have raised him better.And I feel so down thinking how I would feel if my sibling went against me.It would rip me apart!" you went on,softly putting your palm on the upper part of the fabric,where the heart should be.
Ludwig`s gaze never left your body as you narrated about your patients - Abel,who became addicted to drugs,because he thought it was his only salvation after the pain his younger sister,Bella left in his soul after her tragic death,the guilt feeling which raised to Desislav`s heart whenever he was face to face with Miza,the being whom was supposed to be his younger sister,but of whom he couldn`t think as he should - he loved her more than that - and there were many other examples.
"I wish we could see the stars from here!It would be so pretty,don`t you think?" you asked,somewhat happier.
"Mhm!It would.Do you feel better, Süße?" Ludwig questioned,brushing a few of (h/c) locks from your face.
"Much better! Vielen Dank,Lutz!You always help me to find my way out of the fog!" you answered,a pretty smile on your glossy lips.
The German loosened a little bit more seeing that genuine smile he loved on your pretty face.He had thought how you lighten up his world with such a simple gesture - after a busy day of work,completing stacks of papers - some of discharge,some notes to the worse cases - running from a surgery room to another,assisting the trainees,teaching them the best,having to give his best advice when it came to multiple affected systems - was certainly a burden.
In his subconscious was still printed that image of the young male he had to operate.The patient`s figure was distorted and he was more dead than alive.Ludwig hasn`t wasted any second,taking his utensils,making a neat cut with the medical knife.Even with his skilled hands - which most of his former patients thought as blessed - the monitor emitted that annoying beeping sound and short after the softly whistled,more of a whailed cry,came as the patient`s heart stoped - the seconding doctor officially announced the time of death and a nurse notted it down.
He felt guilty,though he wasn`t at fault.After short investigations,the police declared that the patient was at fault for not wearing a helmet while driving with an insane speed the motorcycle.Not even the police`s assurance made the stern German feel better - he thought of himself as a failure.
But as you were there for him,the shoulder he could cry on,the person in front of whom he could break the wall he had to put up with the others,he offered all his tourments on a silver plate - all but one.His love grew gradually and before being aware of the simple fact,he was already deeply in love.
It wasn`t a thing he could treat.And he no longer could treat it as it was in terminal phase.He couldn`t do something about it but living it.And he was enjoying every second of it.
Ludwig let his forhead against yours,smiling one of his rare smiles - that breathtaking smile which made everything so much better.A smile of his was worth a thousand days in the dessert.
"Maybe you should take a break from your job!" were the words which escaped his lips.
You looked with curious (e/c) eyes into his baby blue ones.He was composed and dead serious,which meant it wasn`t a joke - as Ludwig rarely ever made jokes.That piercing gaze of his was a mixture of determination blended with softness - and was that longing?But what was possibly missing the blonde headed German?
He let those beautiful three words escape his full lips,the accents placed in the right places,making it even more alluring - was that even possible? - and in the next second his chapped lips were on yours,dacing ritmically a soft waltz as one of his arms was wrapped around your small back,keeping you close to his well tonned body.
"Ich liebe dich auch,Ludwig!" you said,resting your head onto his chest.

'If you feel something for someone,just say it out loud!Keeping it secret will grind your soul in insecurity - What if...?' - Rule no 1 for living a happy life - by (Name) Beilschmidt.